1. My uncle once yelled at me for eating his living room.
2. Never in my life have I felt so confident and so uncertain at the same time.
3. When I was five I was chased by boys until I teamed up with them to chase other girls. I negotiated with my oppressors and then became one of them. This is either sad or smart.
4. High school was something to survive.
5. I will never forget the time I thought I'd been transported back to high school and had to live it all over again.
6. Once I met a few famous people and felt really really awkward.
7. There’s this boy I know who is smarter than he thinks.
8. Once, at a bar, I fell off a barstool.
9. By noon, I'm usually starving.
10. Last night I could not sleep to save my life.
11. If only I had cajones.
12. Next time I go to church it will be for someone's wedding or funeral.
13. What worries me most is that the world won't be a hospitable place for my children.
14. When I turn my head left I see my husband still sleeping.
15. When I turn my head right I see my bookshelf that desperately needs organizing.
16. You know I’m lying if I say I'm voting Republican. (I almost can't lie--seriously.)
17. What I miss most about the Eighties is my own youth.
18. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be Viola.
19. By this time next year things will be very different.
20. A better name for me would be "the strident technophile."
21. I have a hard time understanding why people don't change.
22. If I ever go back to school, I’ll study computer science or law.
23. You know I like you if I invite you out for drinks.
24. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be my husband.
25. Take my advice, never assume you can spend time with someone you love later.
26. My ideal breakfast is two eggs over easy with toast, grape jelly, bacon, hashbrowns and cantelope with coffee and orange juice, preferably in a restaurant.
27. A song I love but do not have is half the songs on the radio that I don't know the names of.
28. If you visit my hometown, I suggest going only to visit friends. There's really not much to do there.
29. Why won’t people conserve energy?
30. If you spend a night at my house we'll treat you right.
31. I’d stop my wedding for someone having a heart attack.
32. The world could do without George W. Bush.
33. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than vote for John McCain.
34. My favorite blondie is a cookie.
35. Paper clips are more useful than shoe horns.
36. If I do anything well it’s writing and troubleshooting weird technical problems.
37. I can’t help but sleep in past when I told myself I'd get up.
38. I usually cry when I'm angry.
39. My advice to my nephew/niece is to get as far away from your parents for a while as you can. Live your own life!
40. And by the way, this was harder than it looks.