Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Wednesday Whining, or stream of consciousness complaining

I'm gearing myself up for whining today. I'm tired. I could not go to sleep last night despite having several drinks with friends which should have knocked me out completely. But the effects pretty much wore off by 9 p.m. Still, I was too tired to write, nearly too tired to blog (though I managed). I read Harry Potter for a few hours. I'm disappointed that I didn't really accomplish anything yesterday--no laundry, no writing, no cleaning up, not even much at work. I wish I could just stay at home between now and the time school starts and work just a few hours out of each day because really, that's all the work I have. The rest is filler. It's depressing to send out email to people only to receive a vacation message in response that indicates the receiver is in an exotic location for a month. I want to be in an exotic location dammit. And I don't want to be tied to my desk reading email from people in exotic locations. I want a book deal, a movie deal, or some kind of job that has a little more flexibility. Or barring that (because I do like my job), I'd like to figure out what kind of schedule would satisfy my antsiness. 7 to 3? Actually, I could work 8-3:30 (with only 1/2 hour lunch). Hmmm.

I have too much on my mind these days--the bills, the looming school year, the aching desire to run away. My only hope is that the weekend will prove relaxing enough to take all the anxiety away because right now I just want to stay home and finish the Harry Potter book, maybe do a load of laundry and watch the last two episodes of The Daily Show. And the reason I can't do this? Some sort of weird notion of responsibility on my part. How odd.