Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Job anxiety

My post that got eaten was about job anxiety. I don't have that much. But enough.

First, I actually like and care about my job. It's not just a job to me. I try to treat it that way for my own sanity, but it's hard. I like to think about what I'm doing, study it, write about it. So when things aren't going well, I have a hard time just blowing it off.

Second, a lot of people around me are frustrated by their jobs, either by people they have to deal with or by certain aspects of their jobs. I commiserate and sympathize with these people.

Third, I struggle with wanting to excel at my job, but not really knowing what that would mean for someone in my position. There's no clear guidelines to indicate when I'm doing a good job.

Finally, I'm in a kind of weird situation with Mr. Geeky working at the same institution and going up for tenure. If he doesn't get tenure, it's likely I will move on as well. And that's kind of weird for me. I think I'd like to stick around for at least 3 more years, possibly longer, depending on how things are going, but I might have to contemplate a huge relocation.

It sucks to be riding sidecar. And it really wouldn't matter, I guess, if I were doing something different. I'd still have to at least consider the possibility of moving in a year. Did I mention this is the second time I've been through this anxiety?